This Momma wants to cut a b**ch!

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Today, we take a break from our regularly scheduled programming (places) to talk about another parenting phenomenon: Back off my kid, or I will take out my hoops, rip off my weave, and cut you!

Raise your hand if you have ever been sitting in preschool play group and some bully of a child took your baby’s toy. Yeah, I know you have been there. And since most of my friends are pretty civilized, I imagine you calmly walked to the children, knelt to their level, and in your sweetest mommy voice said,”Now that’s not how we play. We must share!” Then you pulled the contended toy away and replaced it with two new toys, distracting both little ones and restoring peace.

But I bet deep down inside, you wanted to kick sand in the brat’s face, yank the toy away from him or her, give your baby back what she lost, and give the monster’s mom a piece of your mind.

Guess what? That just keeps on happening. When Libby was in third grade, this chick stole her lunch money. I had that girl as a high school student and it was tough not to give her a failing grade on her tests in retribution. Hilary had her purse stolen out of her university gym cubby this May. She reported it to the campus police, but if I had found the thief, I would have been tempted to punch her in the face ( I assume it was a girl, it was a cute bag from Charming Charlie’s). Daniel’s truck had his truck window bashed in and $600 cash stolen last week. Cannot even speak aloud what I’d like to do to that bum.

But you know what is worse than watching your kids have toys or lunch money or cute bags stolen? Sitting by while a peer tries to steal their confidence.

Libby is being targeted by some pretty vicious gossip this year at school. She’s had rumors spread about her physical involvement with boys, and now she’s the target of a nasty campaign in her very own theatre department. Yes, the one of which I am the director.

This mother wants to march to the homes of some kiddos and smack them upside the head! What I am doing instead is trying to teach Libby to consider the source, ignore what is clearly untrue, and resolutely shun the drama. Of course it is more complicated than that. I will be asked to write college recommendation letters for these kids. They will be auditioning for me in early September. I spend hours each day with them.

So I breathe. I teach. I ask them to examine every bit of gossip before they spread it and ask themselves if it’s true, if it’s good, if it’s helpful, and what is their motivation for sharing it.

I work to restore Libby’s faith in humanity and herself.

And I make sure to leave my hoop earrings at home.

2 thoughts on “This Momma wants to cut a b**ch!

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  1. I have had that urge to take up for and retaliate for my kids, their kids and your kids!! The hardest thing to do as a parent is to watch those kids you love being hurt while you calmly let them learn self control without losing their self confidence. When it involves their peers I have mostly used the technique of letting them work through it in their own way…just encouraging them…although I could tell you of 1 time I mistakenly got involved. However, several times I have without apology stood nose to nose with adults who have done something to hurt my kids for no good reason!! So, praying for your self control, but if Libby needs someone to retaliate for her…let me know…I am old enough to take on those rumor spreaders!!! Give her a hug for me!!

  2. looking at pictures of libby on facebook makes me feel old. the last time i saw her, i feel like, she was still a tiny baby. a sweet innocent little girl who would never hurt a soul. someone so talented in her little self (who last time i saw her was taller than me but that can still be small right?) that i was in awe. i have always been in awe of you bryants. the things you could do with your bodies, your voices, your souls. i look at her now and think, she couldnt have changed. she’s still libby. it hurts me to hear what words can do to her. and it hurts most of all knowing how it feels. its taken me days to get up the courage to write on this post. ive been through that. twice. and i know you dont want to hear all the details because it involves others we both know and love. but i know it hurts. i know it can make you cry at night and it hurts way more than it should. it makes other people think differently than they should, when they know who you are. girls are mean, they are vindictive. after it goes on long enough or again it makes you question who you are and if you actually are what they say and that should never happen. whats going through my mind right now, i guess, is that if someone is doing all those things to libby and making her feel even the teensiest way ive felt, im mad. really really mad. put me on the list of people waiting to beat these chicks up because its not fair to anyone to let this continue to happen.

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